Everything you need to know about UFC 267 Błachowicz vs. Teixeira

ACC UFC contributor Felix Heath-Collins with everything you need to know ahead of UFC 267 Błachowicz vs. Teixeira.

The stacked UFC 267 event this weekend is going to be awesome. Not as awesome as it's going to be for our fellow fans in the US who are getting access to this 'PPV' (Pay-Per-View) for free with their ESPN+ subscriptions. Down here in New Zealand, we're shit out of luck on that front. A New Zealand-accessible UFC fight pass subscription gives you access to full fight nights and numbered event's preliminary cards, it still needs an additional entry fee for PPV main cards - where the truly spectacular fights happen. The scheduling of this event is also weird in the best ways. As a massively upgraded fight night, UFC 267 comes only a week before the next PPV, UFC 268.

In the main event, we have a fairytale fight for the light-heavyweight title between the two unlikeliest champions one could imagine.

The champion Jan Błachowicz (28-8) (wins-losses) signed with the UFC in 2014 only to lose four of his first six fights for the promotion. And then - against all odds - Błachowicz won nine of his next ten fights, culminating in devastating KO's of top light-heavyweight contenders Corey Anderson and Dominick Reyes. Even more impressive was Błachowicz's performance early this year against the Kiwi middleweight champion Israel "The Last Stylebender" Adesanya (who was challenging for Błachowicz's light-heavyweight title). Although Błachowicz didn't KO the Kiwi as he had his last two foes, he did secure a convincing unanimous decision and became the first MMA fighter to beat Adesanya. In that fight, Błachowicz had to resort to wrestling to beat Adesanya the best in the business at kickboxing, but it was impressive for Błachowicz to defeat the undefeated Kiwi nonetheless.

The challenger Glover Teixeira (32-7) has long been championship-level, but that is precisely why he's an unlikely champion: he's been at that championship level for too now. Having just turned 43, Teixeira isn't just old (for a fighter), he's one of the oldest fighters in UFC history to fight for a title. He's still quite some way from the legendary "Captain America" Randy "The Natural" Couture, who lost his title for the last time at 45 years old, before retiring at 47 while still competitive. Glover Teixeira made his pro-MMA debut in 2002, only five years after Randy Couture did in 1997. And, at the height of his career, Teixeira went on an incredible 20-fight win streak that bought him entrance into the UFC plus five wins in the top promotion and a title shot too. Unfortunately, the light-heavyweight at that time was the division's 'GOAT' (Greatest Of All Time) Jon "Bones" Jones. A unanimous decision loss to Jones and a brutal 13-second KO loss against Anthony "Rumble" Johnson were major setbacks at this stage. Unlike his hero "Iron" Mike Tyson, however, Glover Teixeira won't quit. And, with a five-fight win streak at the twilight of his career, Teixeira has a lot to gain without much to lose.

Rocky would have us believe that sportsmen and women are either good or bad, right or wrong. But it's never that simple. In the case of this main event, we inarguably have two Rockys. The Polish champion Jan Błachowicz has a tight and conservative counter-striking style consisting of mostly fundamental boxing, with some kickboxing too. His wrestling advantage in the Adesanya fight had more to do with his size advantage than a particularly impressive wrestling skill set. The Brazillian contender Glover Teixeira has a wilder and more powerful boxing style reminiscent of his hero Mike Tyson. Slower and far less strategic than Błachowicz, Teixeira won't quit unless you forcibly separate his soul from his body, which ain't easy. Yet I expect Błachowicz to try precisely that.

In the co-main event, we have the casual fan's favourite fight between Russian Petr "No Mercy" Yan and Cory "The Sandman" Sandhagen for the UFC interim bantamweight championship. In this one, all you need to know are the nicknames.

Petr "No Mercy" Yan (15-2) is the former bantamweight champion who beat himself. After a violent 14-1 start to his career, Yan had earned himself a shot against featherweight great Jose Aldo "Junior" for the UFC bantamweight title that former champion Henry "The Messenger" Cejudo had relinquished in his retirement. A fifth-round TKO secured Yan his belt, and he seemed unlikely to relinquish it anytime soon. However, in his first title defence and very next fight, Yan beat his foe Aljamain Sterling for four rounds, only for Yas to knee Sterling illegally in the head while Sterling was grounded, leading to the fight's stoppage via disqualification and Sterling's strangest possible title win. Now that Sterling is injured and out for the foreseeable future with surgeries, Petr Yan looks to capture perhaps the first-ever justified interim championship. The best without a belt, and the probably favourite to win, Petr Yan truly has "No Mercy". He crushes his opponents with relentless, bullying pressure and sophisticated, powerful boxing technique. He's a smaller, Russian Canelo Alvarez with equally small gloves.

Cory "The Sandman" Sandhagen (14-3) is also true to his nickname. The American "Sandman" Sandhagen puts people to sleep with the same practised ease of his mythical namesake. A loose and fluid kickboxer with flashy spin kicks and flying knees aplenty, Cory Sandhagen is the perfect foil for the sadistic simplicity of Petr Yan. Five rounds between the marauding Russian bull and the acrobatic American matador, we are guaranteed a hell of a fight.

In the hardcore (and/or Kiwi) fan's main event, lightweight 'GOAT' Khabib Nurmagomedov's childhood friend and prodigy Islam Makhachev faces fan favourite Auckland native Dan "The Hangman" Hooker.

Islam Makhachev (20-1), unlike his idol Khabib, has striking almost as good as his supreme grappling. With only a single loss over 21 fights (albeit a devastating 1st round KO loss), Makhachev is in many fans' minds a future champion. And with the varied reports that Khabib is an even better coach than fighter, the whole lightweight division best be careful. Having long trained with Khabib's now-deceased father Abdulmanap Nurmagomedov, Makhachev is Khabib's brother in all but name.

Dan "The Hangman" Hooker (21-10) is fighting distilled. He's a tall, lanky mess of limbs that are each sharply refined to finish fights. Hooker's superior height, reach, and distance management makes him a terrifying prospect for anyone standing up. He's a kickboxing sometimes brawler, sometimes counter-striker who revels in violence. Spider-like knees up to the body or head are Hooker's specialty weapons, and his blitz combinations are a surprisingly calculated bit of chaos in his game. That "Hangman" moniker comes into play when Hooker manages to wrap up his opponents' necks with a guillotine choke. Don't expect him to choke out Islam Makhachev, however. In that case, Khabib would never speak to Makhachev again.

Who wins? Who knows! Of course, we all want the native hero to win dominantly and with ease. But that is wishful thinking with a Dagestani "smesh"-er in the opposite corner. In such a massive underdog position, though, Dan Hooker has a golden opportunity in front of him. So now we wait in terrified anticipation and excitement, as we always do with fights this great. Nothing beats the "Thrill and the Agony" of MMA, after all.

The main card starts for us here in New Zealand at 7:00 AM this Sunday, while the nine-fight prelims start back at a silly 3:30 AM. Turn off your phones to avoid spoilers and sleep in, before watching the fights all Sunday. It's a sacred day of rest, after all.